The Brutal Bar Scene

The other night I was out at a couple of bars to hang out with a friend from out of town. He wanted to check out a hot bar scene, so we went to Bar Pink in North Park and The Whistle Stop in South Park. There were plenty of girls and people were dancing so my friend was happy, but I couldn't stand it. Me and my girlfriend paid ten bucks to get into Whistlestop and I hated it in there so much that I didn't even mind when everyone in our group decided to leave about five minutes after we got there. The music was too loud for me and the dance floor was so packed it felt like a mosh pit. It was a sweaty mess of people knocking into each other while singing along to latest played out hip hop song. So later we ended up at Bar Pink. The music was loud as !@#$ and there were slightly less people, but I would still classify the experience as awful. I know I can be a little nerdy and cranky sometimes, but still, what sane adult would want to put themself through this crap?

so I guess all I can say is
"I'm getting too old for this shit" (Detective Murtaugh, Lethal Weapon 1).

Blog Fail!

The last entry didn't make it to Facebook, it must be some sort of microchip or matrix-style problem. This is bad news because now the Facebookers can't get to my latest fantastic gripe.

Where are the new Inventions? It is supposed to feel like 2011 not 1987.

Nobody is inventing @#$! anymore. What happened to the mag-lev car idea? Or how about just an electric pencil sharpener that isn't super loud? I remember watching all these great future shows and movies back in the eighties with flying skateboards and jetpacks that can get you to work. What happened with all that? Did all the inventing stop when when the late great Billy Maze died? These days it seems like the only new inventions are iphone apps. Where is the magic and life changing innovation that I was promised during my childhood? I know there are cars that park themselves and an app for the iphone that can make boobs jiggle, but that isn't enough. We need a new transmorgrafier or at least a teleportation machine. I thought this was 2011, but for some reason it still feels like 1996. I saw Back To The Future and I want that stuff that that Marty McFly had. I watched James bond twenty years ago and we still don't have submarine cars on every block. It is 2011 and I ask modern scientists, inventors and Vince, the Shamwow guy: Where's the beef?

Save my Job, Don't be a Snob!

I am asking you to do this because I am an adjunct at Grossmont college and the next round of California State budget cuts are going to burn my bacon for sure.

"Please support the governor's proposal to put the tax extension measure on the June Ballot."

That is what you should say when you call the offices of these Republican legislators:

Senator Joel Anderson (916)651-4036
Senator Mark Wyland (916)651-4038
Assemblymember Nathan Fletcher (916)319-2075
Assemblymember Brian Jones (916)319-2077
Assemblymember Martin Garrick(916)319-2074

I don't usually get all political, but I am desperate, and if you can make a difference then help me out. I'll make these calls this afternoon for what it's worth.

I'm sorry to have to ask you to get involved in this political crap and I promise not to post any more buzz killington stuff like this again.

I've got a new word for you

Ontology. This is the way that something is learned. The word actually sounds more interesting than that, when I first heard it I thought it had some kind of theological significance. In grad school I had to write a paper in a rhetoric class. The prompt had something to do with argument and the ontological concerns of a text. I thought my vague idea of the word would get me through it and I didn't bother to look it up. It was an eight to ten page paper and I got a C on it because I royally screwed up the section on ontological belief. I also must have looked like a doofus when I presented the paper at the teacher's house with the rest of the class, which is something I was uncomfortable doing in the first place. I didn't really like the teacher, so the last place I wanted to go was her house.

So students, look up words you don't know in writing assignments. And teachers, don't ask students to attend the last class of the semester at your house, its creepy.

Look forward to tomorrow's exciting new blog entry about my next inane thought.

The Price of Beer at Duke's Liquor is too Damn High!

70th and El Cajon is the major intersection by my apartment. So when I want to go buy some beer I go to Duke's Drive-In Liquor. When I first started buying from them I used to get twelve packs of Milwaukee's Best also known affectionately as The Beast.. I know it's not the best, but the price was right at $5.99. After about a year they stopped carrying Milwaukee's Best and instead, stocked their fridge with Keystone. Keystone is not much worse than the Beast so I didn't complain. Several months later the price went up to $6.99 and that is when I really started to miss the old Beast. And so my campaign began. I asked Stephan, the owner, what happened to my favorite cheap beer and he said he didn't order it any more. I asked him to get it for me and he said that he would think about it. From then on it was an ongoing conversation between us. It was kind of a little joke, and I pretty much gave up on ever getting the Beast back, but in the back of my head I dared to dream that one day it would be back on the shelf. I even went so far as to promise Stephan that I would buy all the Beast he stocked because he was worried that it wouldn't sell.

Finally, yesterday, my big moment arrived. I went to Duke's Drive-In Liquor and went to get my twelve pack of beer and there it was, Milwaukee's Best, the Beast. But things were not all good. My favorite finest cheapest beer was labelled at $8.49. What the !@#$ kind of crap is that? On the box it said Milwaukee's Best Premium, maybe old Stephan thought that was enough to merit a price change. Or maybe he thought he could get away with this screw job because it is a new product in his store. Either way I am quite pissed. And the icing on the cake is that he doesn't even carry Keystone anymore, he still has Keystone light, but any connoisseur knows that doesn't really count. So now my cheapest option has gone from $6.99 to $8.49 for a damn twelve pack of crummy beer.

I didn't get a raise last week and I don't recall any recent changes in the economy. So I don't know why old Stephan at Duke's Drive-In Liquor thinks he can get away with this.  I guess it's time to drag myself over to Miles Liquor a block and a half away. Until yesterday I never quite understood the old expression, "Be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it" but now I get it, and it is a real pisser. If you're out there Stephan of Duke's Liquor, have a heart, don't be so cold, you can drop the tough guy act. We both know that Milwaukee's Best Premium is the same old cheap ass beer. Bring down the price Stephan, you don't run a freaking gas station, there is no need for such shockingly abusive price gouging. Look for me next week in front of Duke's on El Cajon, I'll be the one picketing in protest of this uproarious injustice.
"Hey hey, ho ho, this high priced beer has got to go!"  

Headphone Rap Stars

If you are listening to rap music on your headphones do you really need to rap along with the song? I thought the whole point of headphones was that I didn't have to hear it. And why is it whenever somebody walks by me and they are rapping along with the song its alway at the part where the rapper goes f!@# you b%$#. I feel like rap music today is giving me self esteem issues. But I guess it could be worse, some fool on his ipod could be yelling out rock lyrics, but we all know that would never happen because rock music today is so horrible that nobody would even try to say that bullcrap in public.

That's right, I started off complaining about rap music but the real complaint is modern rock. All you contemporary modern rockers are lame and you know it. Do your part to help stop noise pollution, just pack it up along with all your crappy Wilco CDs too. Oh, and for all my friends who have their own rock bands right now, this definitely applies to you.